The sky is falling

by bkajlich

As a Seattle native, it is with great disgust that I report to you that my roof in Los Angeles has sprung a leak. A pretty ugly one too.  In fact, if I didn’t know better I would think the entire ceiling was caving in.  I love knowing that the Pacific Northwest faction of my readers are stifling a chuckle right now.  The worst part is that the third and biggest storm of the week is expected to hit tomorrow morning and last through the weekend.  I’m not even sure it’s fair to say that I sat this evening as one eyeball was cocked to the ceiling the entire time.  I have a feeling tomorrow is going to be reeeeeeeeeeeeeeal interesting.

grrrrrrrrrrrr. Hard to be inspired when I am feeling anxious that I might be kayaking down the stairs to breakfast in the morning.  Trying to think of what lesson I might derive from this experience.  It’s hilarious what pops into your head when you’re trying to be spiritual and so not feeling it.  I’m thinking: “what analogy can I use to compare the dripping water flowing though the beams of my ceiling to the way that life will find it’s way to seep in to…. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I can’t believe my freaking roof is leaking!!!!!!!”  ugh. so much for zen.

So finally, in a last ditch effort to make something out of this fiasco, I typed “Leak Quotes” into google(or as my slovak father calls it: GOOGILY).  Up popped this quote by Samuel Johnson: “He that pursues fame with just claims, trusts his happiness to the winds; but he that endeavors after it by false merit, has to fear, not only the violence of the storm, but the leaks of his vessel.” ahhhhhh now this is something I can work with.  It reminds me that part of meditation is becoming a vessel.  Every time, I am emptying my cup to allow space for what comes next. I am giving permission for whatever is present in the moment to exist.  When we take this practice out into the world, it allows us to release the need to focus on the outcome.  The real gift is THE DOING and the presence of your authentic self while engaged in the doing.

Tonight I gave up worrying about my dumb ceiling.  It’s just drywall and paint, and some of my stuff might get wet, big deal.  I went upstairs and made a list of fun things I could do in the morning if there was water everywhere…. kayak to breakfast, invite friends over for indoor slip n slide, and recreate scenes from “Waterworld” topped the list.

My roof may have leaks, but my vessel doesn’t.  And that’s all that really matters. xx