Follow the White Rabbit…

by bkajlich

I do a lot of strange things.

Sometimes, as I’m heading into another one of my adventures, I’ll start questioning myself as the reality of what I am about to do sinks in. This is usually about the time that my mom or sister will get a slightly shaky voiced phone call letting them know that I’m bout to go dark. No cell phones allowed for the next couple days. Such are the rules at these types of things…

“What kind of things?” you’re probably wondering at this point(or you’re not, cause you could care less and are probably heading back to Twitter or FB now). Well,  I’m not talking about anything strange or extreme like skydiving, or cliff jumping, or cave diving or swimming with sharks… (FYI, I am terrified of flying AND sharks and my worst fear is that I will be on a plane that crashes into the ocean and SURVIVE!!!… only to be eaten by sharks. But I digress) No. I’m not talking about adrenaline-junky outdoorsy stuff.  In fact, the complete opposite. I’m talkin bout following a seemingly innocent, fluffy white bunny down a mother truckin rabbit hole.

AKA the journey into the inner workings of this crazy ass mofo that I sometimes refer to as “myself”.

My free falls down the rabbit hole have included any number of things that most people would categorize under the title of NEW AGE SHIT. I prefer to call it OLD AGE as most of it has been around since before you were a twinkle in the twinkle of the eye twinkle that started all twinkles. However, I get it. It’s all kinda weird. And my guilty admission is that I LOVE IT ALL. And the more I involve myself in it, the weirder it gets and the more it helps me understand all the shizz that I don’t.

NOW.  I do think I’m pretty normal when it comes to most things. I have healthy doses of confidence and insecurities. I try to practice moderation but find it difficult in matters concerning A) food B) love C) animals(hence my four dogs) and D) did I say food? However, there is one way in which I wish everyone would let themselves embrace a little more of the crazy… and that is in whatever way you find best allows you to get to the heart of your authentic truth. In other words:

WHO ARE YOU WHEN ALL ELSE FADES AWAY?

Very few of us can answer this question at first blush.  If you can… kudos to you, and I hope you will share a little of your journey with the world in some capacity, we need more of these stories.  And if you can’t even think of where to begin to answer this question, kudos to you too! This moment of honesty will serve as the first step towards a very big and rewarding adventure. Mine begin almost exactly 15 years ago(click to read because that’s a whole nother story). What started with meditation classes evolved into retreats; some involving other people, some that involved just me, on my own. Ayurveda soon followed; it is the world’s oldest medicinal practice and means “the science of life” It has brought such balance and peace into my world. Newer interests include Tantra and Tarot, and specific energy and body work.  I have sat with perfect strangers in solidarity as we opened ourselves to our greater truths in front of one another… I have sat alone with myself and bawled like a big ol baby as I came to terms with my imperfections and the ways in which I still have so much to learn. I have grown to love my flaws as much as my strengths. I have grown to forgive, and let go, and to try to find compassion for all… even those that our world would have us believe do not deserve it.  I am striving, living, dying every day to keep my heart open open open. That is the only truth my friends, that is the only choice that leads us into the arms of love.

Follow your white rabbit. It doesn’t have to be meditation or retreats. It doesn’t have to be New Age or Old Age or involve anything that you don’t like or makes you uncomfortable. Well, it should make you a little uncomfortable… enough so that you are pushed beyond the boundaries that prevent you from being honest with yourself. But mostly…

It just has to open your heart.

It just needs to teach you about you. It needs to show you the way to be patient and kind. It could be working on something that focuses your mind and brings you peace.  It might be learning a new language. Doing charity work. Maybe it’s simply waking up each day and being honest about what scares you. Or just admitting to yourself that you are a work in progress and lovable YES LOVABLE every step of the way.

Open your eyes. Trust your heart. Let your white rabbit show you the way.

xxb